Have you been wanting to rekindle a relationship? In an ideal world, all relationships would be smooth sailing. Even if there was no disagreement, some relationships just fizzle out because they have different priorities or neither party has put in the effort to maintain it. If there is a connection you wish to restart, Professional Matchmaker Linda Prescott shares some practical ways. Good luck!
Pretend you’re just getting to know them for the first time
Ever heard of the expression ‘once bitten, twice shy’? Well, if you are attempting to rekindle a relationship that fizzled out due to an argument or ill feelings, it’s best to start fresh. Try and reconnect with your friend or former partner as if you are meeting someone entirely new. And when it comes to new people after a bad experience, you are more cautious and also won’t throw all your eggs in the basket because you never know where this ‘new’ connection might take you. Being cautious keeps you from pouring yourself into a relationship that won’t work. But if you notice that the other person is making the right amount of effort, you might just be looking at a newly rekindled relationship.
Let them think about it
You know how some companies do cold-calling to gauge your interest? Well, with trying to rekindle a lost relationship, you’ll have to use the same strategy here. Instead of inviting the person out for lunch or dinner straightaway, you might want to start small. An email or a text is always a good way to start the spark. It’s also less pressuring. Because let’s be honest, you don’t know if the other person would like to reconnect or is ready to do so. If you get a positive answer to your email or text, that could be a sign that they are ready to meet up. Perhaps lunch can finally be on the cards again. Remember, if you really want to rekindle a relationship, don’t be pushy… just take it slow.
Drop the ego
They say, the biggest space between two people is… ego! Yes. If they have not called or texted you and you haven’t either, there is no way the relationship can rebuild. It takes one person to initiate again for this to work. So if you are sure you want to rekindle the relationship, it might be a good idea to make the first move. Put your ego aside and send that text or email. It doesn’t have to be something so serious. It can be maybe a funny meme you have seen online and you can say that it reminded you of them or a funny moment you both experienced. It can also be interesting events happening around you that you just know the other person would appreciate. Once you’ve made the first move, see what happens. If they respond, great. But if they don’t, don’t beat yourself up and it’s perhaps a sign that the relationship is not meant to be.
Keep an open mind
You know, just because your relationship with them was solid and you knew them well, it doesn’t mean that they are still the same. If some time has gone by, this person might be a completely different one than the one you knew since you last spoke. And they might not be the only ones that have changed too. In fact, you both have grown and changed. This does not mean it’s bad. It just means that instead of rekindling a lost relationship, look at it as building a completely new one. Treat it as a new relationship and make sure you build a solid foundation before diving into the deep end. Whatever it is, look at this relationship with fresh eyes. Good luck!