When we talk about unhealthy relationships, unfortunately it’s not limited to just dating and friendships. Unhealthy relationships can also be anywhere from places like work and your community, and it really is the last thing you want in life. Linda Prescott reveals Signs of An Unhealthy Relationship and How to Protect Yourself.
#1 They Are Not Encouraging You to Grow as a Person.
In a healthy relationship, you are supposed to be supported as you grow and encouraged to become the best version of yourself. Psychologist Gregory Kushnick says that in an unhealthy relationship, instead of being happy and supportive for you, your self-improvement is viewed as a threat. For example, if you mention that you are thinking of learning a new skill or wanting to start a healthy lifestyle, an unsupportive person would mock you or dismiss your intention and ideas instead of being supportive. They would squash any idea that might help you be better than them. They also don’t know how to appreciate your hard work and can’t rejoice in your accomplishments.
Tip: If someone needs to minimize your strengths and achievements to make themselves feel better, it may be time to move on. If this person is a family member or colleague and you have no way to “move on”, do not let their comments affect your decisions as they might not be acting in your best interest.
#2 They Drain You.
If instead of feeling energised and happy, you feel exhausted or drained after spending time with them, you have an unhealthy relationship. According to Murdoch University, a toxic person can make you feel emotionally exhausted after spending time with them, as you feel like you’re the one constantly giving and making the effort, without getting anything in return. A healthy relationship is a two way street, if you’re the only one making the effort, you’re probably the only person who cares.
Tip: Instead of spending time with people who drain you, look for people who make you feel positive. Put positive people on your VIP list and you’ll see how much happier you’ll be.
#3 They Are Very Negative
It’s almost impossible to have a positive conversation with them. Everything that comes out of their mouths is negative. Yes, everyone has issues and demons in their lives but there are some people who become defensive, combative, and full of excuses when you try to help them. They tend to like talking about the same issues but never really take the initiative to improve the situation. It’s like wanting endless pity for problems they don’t actually seek to solve.
Tip: If having to provide support for people who act this way causes you stress and never-ending frustration, it’s best to stay away. They have no intention of growing as a person and their negative energy will just drain you.
#4 They Constantly Judge Others
Here’s the thing – Toxic people always judge others but never themselves. There’s always something wrong with other people, the things they do, who they’re friends with, and even what they wear. They always think they are better than others and this causes them to look down on others, resulting in them judging people around them. They love gossiping and talking bad about others, and sometimes end up making you complicit in all the trash talk.
Tip: Don’t get caught in the drama. If someone in your office or personal life starts talking bad about others, it’s best to zip it. Don’t add anything to the conversation as you do not want to get involved in any potential drama. The last thing you want is for your own statement to get passed around and getting you into trouble.
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