First date jitters are real. And completely normal! If you catch yourself feeling anxious before your dates, it’s time to discover ways to overcome your fears and feel more relaxed. Butterflies-in-your-tummy, nervous sweats, feeling jittery…that pretty much sums up what dating anxiety feels like. You can blame this on the build-up of having to meet someone for the very first time and the fear of being rejected.
Rest assured, dating anxiety is absolutely normal regardless of what stage in life you’re in. On the plus side, it shows that you care and are ready to date rather than the opposite. On the negative side, going through this uneasiness each time you have to go on a date for the first time can get overwhelming and nerve-racking. Thankfully there are ways you can help take away the pressure of meeting someone new as well as change the way it affects you moving forward. Professional Matchmaker Linda Prescott shares the secrets to feeling relaxed on your first date.
First and foremost, try not to stress or overthink things that have yet to happen. Remember you’re not the only one going into a risky situation. You’ll both likely feel vulnerable but the key to lessening the jitters is to remain calm and be confident instead. You’re worthy of this date and you’re worth getting to know. Do things that will help to boost feel-good hormones like serotonin (which can help to keep anxiety and depression at bay) before your date. Try jogging, taking a brisk walk in the nearby park, or getting a relaxing massage.
Push negative thoughts aside
Try not to self-sabotage with negativity. Thoughts like ‘what if I’m not good enough’, ‘what if they won’t like me’, and ‘what if there’s no chemistry’ are hypothetical. Don’t sell yourself short and don’t let catastrophic thoughts take over. You haven’t been on the date yet. For all you know, it could be the best date you’ve been on. So instead of practicing such self-destructive behaviour, remind yourself of the positives in going on this date – it could be the start of something beautiful, it could be fun, it’ll build your communication/people skills, etc. Feeling relaxed will help you focus on the most important thing during the date — getting to know them and making a connection.
Quell anxiety with the art of meditation. Taking time out of your day to tune into yourself and your surroundings is a quick and easy way to ease stress and evoke a sense of calm. All you really need is 5 or 10 minutes out of your day. These days apps like Calm are available for you to use on the go. Depending on your schedule, there are guided meditations available from 3 to 25 minutes which you can use to help you relax and unwind. if you prefer something more physical you can also practice a bit of yoga before your date. Centr is a fitness app that gives you the option to practice yoga and pilates in the comforts of home.
Pick who you tell
Share your date plans with one or two friends and loved ones only. Keeping the circle of people you tell small minimises the risk of getting contradicting and unwanted advice. Despite being well-intentioned. The great thing about being an Ideal Introductions client is that you can speak to your Matchmaker who will be able to give you helpful tips and advice. After all, they’ve helped make countless of connections happen!
Think about the positive possibilities
At the end of the day, you have to be in it to win it, right? Not taking a step forward isn’t going to get you where you want to be. So, instead of thinking of the worst things that could happen (which usually don’t), focus your attention and energy on the good things that could happen. Like meeting someone who could change your life! Or at the very least, meeting someone who shares your dream. We are comforted to know that every Ideal client that signed up to our Matchmaking service are 100% ready for a real relationship. They didn’t take the plunge to waste anyone’s time. Not theirs and certainly not yours. So take a deep breath, and look forward to getting to know your date, finding that chemistry and exploring what the future could hold!